Couples Counseling Online
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I work with 1) Couples, 2) Trauma (EMDR), and 3) Individual Depth Therapy.

COUPLES WORK  includes: Pre-Marital counseling, Emotion Focused Couples Counseling (helping couples transform the culture of their relationship)Couples Boot Camp (a couples group), and Depth Couples Therapy (Using a healthy couple as a therapeutic base for more quickly addressing individual issues).

TRAUMA (EMDR) (Helping individuals resolve their traumas and restore their over-activated nervous systems).

INDIVIDUAL DEPTH THERAPY. (Helping Individuals have attachment experiences that re-write their relational blue-prints, setting them up for healthier relationships and more meaningful lives)

To Schedule Online,  call 510-686-3390 or email todd@toddharveymft.com


COUPLES COUNSELING:  I provide a therapeutic space for premarital couples, high conflict couples, couples with communication problems, and couples having that same old fight again and again.  I HELP STABILIZE COUPLES BY HELPING THEM TRANSFORM THEIR NEGATIVE DANCE THAT THEY ARE IN.

Premarital Counseling / preventative couples therapy

Couples caught in negative fighting patterns:  Couples with communication problems, and couples having that same old fight again and again.

High Conflict Couples:  You love each other, but drive each other crazy!

I help couples communicate and deal with conflict in healthier ways.  However, my primary focus is on restoring the “empathic bond”.  In addition to learning your attachment style, ways to communicate and get your needs met effectively, I will help you develop ways of enhancing your emotional intimacy (which leads to better sex, companionship, and connection).

* If Your Partner Is Resistant To Going to Therapy:  

If Your Partner Is Resistant To Going to Therapy:
Having a partner that is not excited about going to couples therapy is quite normal.  My experience is that 80% of men (and 20% of women) are uncomfortable with going to therapy.  If your partner “doesn’t want to air your dirty laundry” or wants to “solve the problem ourselves”, or if he/she thinks that the problem resides in you, then don’t give up hope.  Give me a call.  I’m good at helping your Therapy Resistant Man (or Woman) look forward to our sessions as a chance to upgrade their relationships.

* Depth Couples Counseling After couples are stabilized (learn how to be a stable loving empathic base for each other), I work with couples to work as a team to help each other heal their underlying personal work.  Basically, I have found that doing individual work in the context of couples therapy can be more transformative and quicker than individual therapy.

* I help couples rebuild their relationship by overcoming infidelity.  I guide couples through the very painful three stage process for rebuilding their relationship.

* I’m the Co-founder of Couples-Boot-Camp, an interactive couples group with four to five couples that is fun and interactive.  It is a combination of “class” and experiential / practicing of couples skills.


I am trained in EMDR, a modality that is especially useful for helping you overcome painful PTSD and hyper-vigilant symptoms that are consequences of extremely overwhelming life events such as rape, sexual abuse, molestation, being a victim of a crime, or psychological consequences of following traumatizing military orders.  EMDR  is capable of helping you process your pain so you can have a new start  and not have to continue to be victim of hyper-vigilant painful symptoms.

For more information, check out the links:  A THEORY FOR HOW EMDR WORKS and WHAT HAPPENS IN A TYPICAL EMDR SESSION?


We all learn our ways of being in the world through our primary relationships and from those who raised us.  Often times, our painful ways of being in the world  (of perfectionism, addictions, having to be right, anxiety, depression, etc) are normal responses to a relational blue-print that we’ve gained from how we’ve experienced important relationships. My people come to me with painful relationships and struggles with life.  Initially, I will be with you as you navigate these life challenges.  In the process of doing this, I am intentional about creating a therapeutic bond that  will ultimately allow you to  create new blue-prints so it will be easier to not be set up for similar struggles in the future.  Individual Depth Therapy helps people with both the challenging situation and the underlying dynamics that left without being addressed  would  set you up for having to face the same situation again.

In addition to Individual Depth Therapy, I’ve found learned how R-CS  (Recreation of the Self Therapy), people access who they are underneath the strategies that they’ve developed in the world can be trans-formative.  For many people, they can learn to get in touch with the part of them that knows that they are worthy of boundaries, that knows that they are worthy of connection, and the part that knows what really works for them.  After learning how to choose to get to an empowered place, I invite them to look at the same dilemmas that bring them to counseling in the first place.  Often times, those same dilemmas feel so much smaller and much more solvable.  Then the work is not so much about revisiting the past and healing attachment wounds, but learning how to bring into your life today the deeper you that is underneath the strategies you developed in your early relationships.  For therapists, see the following blog I wrote (How R-CS is Different from Other Healing Modalities.)  For clients, if you have had one session with me and have experienced getting to your core self and want a homework assignment to practice getting there, see the following form (Grounding in Who I Am Practice – Directions).

Check Out Pictures Of My Office

Check Out A Short Online Tour Of My Office

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